Update... Jim's Newest CT Results

The results from Thursday's CT of his chest and body were very good.  "No evidence of metastatic disease"!

Jim still is blind and unable to walk or hold a phone, razor, toothbrush, etc, but.....

his lung tumor, and the brain tumors cannot be seen!! We are also excited that his spinal tumor is "dying" from the Gamma Knife radiation 2 months ago.

It is so sad to receive hurtful messages from Jim's sisters who "expected more empathy from him" when his brother-in-law passed.  Even though I have explained that Jim does not understand what time of the day it is, know when to eat, is unable to comprehend more than very short conversations, they believe we could have "done more for sister Trish"...  I feel this is uncaring, and hurtful to both of us.....

Abundant blessings have come to us these past few days!

Debby's card & cupcakes were delicious!

Butter & Marshall had a great sitter, (Deb), this week!

Denny, Adam & Abby made our lawn beautiful!

Thanks to everyone for the kind thoughts and prayers and most of all understanding!

Karron 

Celtic Woman - A New Journey - You Raise Me Up

For all of us to listen to today.....
Blessings are everywhere... I just need to remember this!


Karron

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JIM!

Jim said to me after having vistors today, "Wow, what party-goers we are!"

Many Cards, Calls & E-mails sending Birthday Wishes!

Lori Steuer Delivers Special Wishes from Underground Railroad Members!

Pam & Lori Bring Cake and Birthday Wishes to House!

Pam, Jim & Karron Enjoy Jim's Special Day!

Abby, Jim & Denny



Dr. Cross Delivers Birthday Card!



Looking at Options......

While on the Inspire Site I read many successful stories of people surviving the type of cancer Jim has....

(Non-smoker, lung tumor, EGRF positive)

I think I will make a list today of the options possibly available to us...

One option is to take an immune stimulating pill, LDN.... (Low Dose Naltrexone)  It is taken nightly and seems to stimulate autoimmune responses for all sorts of diseases, even lung tumors....

Knowing that some web sites are bogus, I plan to discuss this next week in St. Louis during Jim's appointment with the oncologist...

Blessings....

Bright Sunny Day!

Debby's visits each evening with Jim!

Test Results & More ...

New table and chairs for porch!! (Gift from Francie & Rick)

Jim's latest CT, (done 2 weeks ago) shows a possible tumor growth in his right kidney...

next week we are going to Barnes for more tests....

We have lost our brother-in-law, Dennis this week due to a tumor in his pancreas...

He was very healthy until about 3 weeks ago and was at the University of Chicago for the initial biopsy and remained until his death on Monday...

What a quiet, gentle man!

We are the God parents of his son, Jordan...

Jim is trying now to decide if he is strong enough for the trip to Chicago to see his sister...

Summer Blessings...

Nice, new front porch for Jim to enjoy the mornings with coffee!

New short hair for me... (mistake, but oh well...)

Planning Jim's Birthday Celebration!

What fun it is to look at all our photos this week!

Many wonderful memories!

 

David Phelps - No More Night

This is a song that has helped  "lift my spirits"!

What a BLESSING!!

I Can Do This! (Really)

While eating breakfast on the porch with Jim this morning during the thunderstorm, I forgot about the anxiety and the thoughts which consumed me yesterday....
I know I can do this... whatever "This" means...

Making my "to-do-list" and drinking strong coffee from our new one cup Keurig, I realized that if I faced just one challenge at a time, (even if I completed or started one a day), maybe, just maybe I CAN do it...

My list today will be short...

1. Finish the "Waiver of Premium Benefit" insurance forms for Liberty Mutual,,, (seven) and mail at post office by 4pm...
                        Note to self.... What is a "Waiver of Premium Benefit"?

2. Complete my retirement forms......  maybe....

3. Grocery store...find nice steak and potato for this evening!!!

4. Call Debby for help!!!!

Karron

 

Things for later....

Get parking disability card for car...
Buy flowers for garden....
Spend gift card from Francie at TJ MAXX..... yea!

Can't Stop the Tears!

Why can't I stop crying today??

a. Too much sad news on the computer & T.V?

b. Too much laundry???

c. Too many weeds in my garden????

d. Too many cats wanting to be fed Fancy Feast instead of dry cat food?????

e. Too many bills??????

f. Too many house projects put on hold??????

g.Too many missed dinners with friends and family???????

h. Too little time for walks and long talks with Jim????????

i. Too long a list for groceries and Walmart supplies????????

j. Too many doctor appointments?????????

No, not really....

OK....

Here it is...

I HAVE TO RETIRE FROM A JOB I LOVE.... (REALLY... REALLY... LOVE!)

I'm sad, lonely and I feel for the very first time...useless...

**More...445pm
I feel better now.. my sister-in-law e-mailed me & I heard from some of the nurses at MMC...
Their GPE picture made me smile!!
& Lin dropped by to see Jim!


Karron

Enjoying Monday!

Breakfast on porch!

Nap after breakfast... of course!

A new week, and so far Jim is feeling pretty spunky!

Off to St. Louis Later Today

Yes... we will be traveling to St. Louis later today.... again...
The trip is nice, once I get everything and everyone in the car.....

MRI is scheduled for 6pm (for his spinal tumor) We plan to stay the night after supper at Applebees!



Blessings:

Great friends and supportive family!

The benefit raised $5,000!! (Planning to keep in savings & buy electric bed!!)

Karron

Everything Has Changed......

While Jim is taking an afternoon nap, I have decided to begin another blog.....(Why does it seem to take so much energy???)
I have looked back on my past blogs and have realized that there is so much I have not talked about....

Like.....

How do we plan for our funerals when we still have hope that we will live together for many years to come???

Why do we keep Jim's car in the driveway when he has lost his vision???

Why do we talk about "little", meaningless things like the Royal Wedding when time together may end too soon???

Why do we watch Dancing with the Stars when we could be spending time together, sharing, loving and praying???

I want to believe that both Jim & I have faith that God will direct us through all the difficult decisions and challenges facing us.....we just want to have a little "normal" in our lives and in our home.

As Jim's friends gather for his "Get Well Reception" today, I want to stop the tears, the doubts and endless questioning.....

I'm so thankful for so much..... it should be easier to do!

Karron

Off to Physical Therapy Today!!!!

Off to Springfield for Jim's first session of Physical Therapy at Memorial Medical Center....

 

Yea!!





Back now (130pm)!   Jim is napping now after almost an hour of therapy...

I asked him why he was so tired.....he said.... "I thought they would just do paper work today!!"

It's the Little Things....

Yes... It's the little things that I can't do without!
(There is a great Christian song with this title!)

I do miss the greatest "little things" Jim & I shared...

Finding Jim on the front porch with the poodle when I arrive home from work, or shopping...

Seeing the sweet half-smile when I say something really dumb... (like what did you make for dinner?)

Help to balance by checking account, (aka... "bail me out, Jim!" & I'm not Clark Howard!)

 Fixing the shower... (I'm attempting to  change the shower head to one that is also hand-held.)


Help unloading the dishwasher...(This just seems a waste of time..)


Finding flashlights & batteries during a storm..

Evening walks with the dog....

Sitting on the front porch with by two guys, Butter & Jim!

More... to ..come....

Exercising to the California Girls!

We are listening to the Beach Boys again.....
Jim's goal this morning is to "bike" 2 miles again before taking his mid-morning nap!

(Thank goodness for Ritalin......)

This afternoon Jim wants to go to Best Buy and check out the HD televisions.....

He has convinced himself that one that is big and good quality he will be able to see..... (more to come...)

Physical therapy and occupational therapy start next week.... yea!

"Back in the Saddle"!

Jim is feeling better today!!

He has gained 2 pounds this morning!!


Blessings....

Dick who "reminds" Jim that it is Thursday and time for Kiwanis!

Diana Chesley for sending the great Walmart gift card!  (To be used on our spring flower garden!)

Karron

Sunshine and More...

Jim has enjoyed the front porch today and several visits from neighbors out walking today in the sunshine!

We received a very cute gift card from one of our friends, Debbie...

How timely!

I just found some pictures of my Great-grandparents.....
I believe I remember these photos....

Their home in Whitewright Texas was very small and if I remember correctly, just 3 rooms!!!

Blessings....

Adam & Abby who visit and play with Butter!

Karron

Monday, Monday! (Bubbles & More!)

Yes...

Jim gets to take a bubble bath every day for his dry skin... (he sheds about a pound a day of dry skin (not really). Tarceva causes the skin cells to "shed".....

We had to call the carpenter after this picture was taken, (really!).  He fainted after standing and fortunately he was holding on to the wall railing... unfortunately, he held on to it while falling back into the bubbles and the fiberglass wall and hand support went with him!!! (really) Good news no broken bones or bruises and all the dry skin fell off....
Now.... we have decided that massages with oil will do for now!!!

Off to Springfield this morning for Zometa infusion and lunch at Olive Garden, (thanks Francie & Rick!)



Blessings....

Angels watching over Jim!

Francie, Trish and Marikay & Sharron!

XO Karron, Jim & Butterscotch

Thoughts About March, 2011

Now that it is April.... yea... Jim and I feel we can take a deep breath and share our "March Stories".

Blogging the first few days of March was a struggle... so... I decided to wait until our lives became a little more normal to continue to share my thoughts..

We made 4 long trips to Barnes in as many weeks for tests, procedures and consultations... Our trips to St. Louis eased somewhat by staying in the hotel which is attached to Barnes and Washington Univ.

I will share the good news first....

After the final CT series our oncologist said, "We really can see only the changes from radiation and chemo in your lungs and cannot see the tumor previously seen in your left chest!"

Wow... after our adventure to the Trauma ER following Jim's fall after midnight from the bed, a broken nose, slightly injured cervical spine, 2 panic attacks requiring medical intervention and many, many MRI's taken of head, back and neck this was WONDERFUL NEWS!.

We were so stunned that we forgot to ask many of our questions that we prepared during the week....

(All of our questions were answered later by phone...)

This good news was reaffirmed by Dr. Dasi in Springfield this Tuesday....

Waking up the next morning we still were unable to put our emotions into words.... Jim still has no vision and will need additional radiation to his back tumor... but...we are soooooo pleased!

We enjoyed meals from Applebee's and Panara Bread and celebrated with orange sodas and cookies!

Blessings!.....

Prayers for Jim's health...

Gift cards from Francie, Marikay, Trish and Debbie...

Visits with our dog, Butter, in St. Louis, thanks to Denny and his family....
Joe and family for bringing communion to Jim...

Supportive messages and calls while we were struggling to keep on schedule for all the tests and radiation....

"Special" hotel rates for Barnes patients and family... & for the great up-grade on the room for a week...

Mass at the Cathedral...

Hotel manager & his doggy!